I’ve rather left the Goldfish (before he was a Goldfish) languishing in hospital – see last post if you need a reminder.
He’d been admitted with agonising stomach pains, brought on by an infection caused by gallstones. After thirteen days, for ten of which he wasn’t allowed to eat in case they were going to operate, he was discharged – with his gallstones intact. The infection had been sorted (as had the pneumonia he contracted while in hospital) and the doctor decided a low fat diet would keep everything under control.
While it was great to bring him home, it was terrifying that his 80-year old wife is now ‘looking after’ him and hasn’t a clue about how to provide a low fat eating plan. She refused my offer to prepare a handout of healthy recipes. I think because she knows they might involve the use of the grill or oven, neither of which she will ever turn on because she thinks they are too expensive to use. If it can’t be microwaved or fried in a pan or deep fat fryer she doesn’t cook it. She used to use the oven once a year to cook Christmas dinner but hasn’t needed to do that since family members took over cooking the festive meal for her.
A few years before the gallstones episode dad took part in a blind trial for a cholesterol drug. The participants and their families were invited to cookery demonstrations to show the variety of low fat meals which could be helpful in reducing cholesterol. His wife refused to attend. Even when at the end of the trial dad was told he had been on the placebo but did, indeed, have high cholesterol, she refused to change her menus – which seemed often to consist of cheap sausages.
Dad’s welcome home from hospital meal consisted of scrambled eggs and Brussel sprouts. She’d found the sprouts on the reduced price shelf at the supermarket – an enormous bag of them, which will last for days. The meal, if unappetising, was at least low fat.
I printed out a couple of pages from a website which gave a clear and simply-put explanation of what it means to have gallstones. We added the hospital’s logo so it looked as though it came from a more official source than Google. Dad was absolutely delighted with it and said he now understood much better. It would be so simple to do something like that when they are in the hospital. The envelope also contained lists of foods divided into three columns for good, to be eaten in moderation and to avoid.
Oven chips are on the moderation list, which means a maximum of once a week. When she expressed delight at the inclusion of over chips the DH was puzzled because he knows she doesn’t use the oven – so how was she planning to cook them? You can’t do in a microwave. She seems to think it’s okay to chuck them in the deep fat fryer!
Despite all the problems, dad was looking and feeling better. He’d been told he’ll be called back after six weeks to see the consultant for a decision on taking out the gallbladder. In a way I hope they don’t because once it’s out there’s no need for a low fat diet – other than for his cholesterol and his heart….I’m sure she’s hurrying him towards an early grave. No, that’s unkind. She’s 80 and it’s hard for her to give up long held beliefs on diet and nutrition – and calling women ladies, and expecting men to open doors for them and believing that men provide for their wives financially while what the wives earn is ‘pin money’ and kept for themselves…
So far no sausages have appeared but she’s already sending the poor man up to Tesco to check out the reduced price shelf.
Nothing will ever convince me that the appalling treatment in hospital, combined with the appalling diet he was fed combined with the drugs to combat the high cholesterol (caused by the appalling diet) did not contribute hugely to the dementia.